8 Weeks- New Sensations

Wow, it's really been a while! What can I say, things are going so well that I don't feel like posting all the time (same old stuff)... My appointments are finally starting to get spread out a little more. I'm going in for my OS appointment in 2 weeks instead of 1 week and my OD appointments are back to 6 weeks apart. It feels good not to have to get up early to go see the OS every week just for a 5 minute checkup.

A few days ago, feeling has started to return to the roof of my mouth. It's kind of a ticklish type of feeling, but I'm just so glad it is coming back. As for my face, only the center of my chin and lower lip are numb yet. The "circle" just keeps getting smaller... Since I'm getting feeling back in my mouth, I've been eating a lot more solid food. Before, the numbness made chewing so uncomfortable. Now, I'm eating chicken and pasta and bread and all those good things that I've missed for 8 weeks now... I'm still holding back on hard, crunchy things like fresh vegetables, nuts and the like. I had a cheese sandwich yesterday and it really was amazing..;-)

My bands are still on 24/7. The gaps in the back are closing, but it's extremely slow. I take off the bands to brush, eat and stretch my mouth and then they are on for the remaining 23 hours. They don't hurt anymore however... About the stretching thing; it really seems hopeless. I stretch all day long, for about 5 minutes each time. I can still fit only 2 fingers in my mouth and it makes me sick. I don't even like talking about it. After a month of stretching, I only improved by a few millimeters. It just doesn't want to get any better.

Day 43- Splint's Offf

I had my splint taken out on Monday. It went a lot smoother than I thought. My OS made a few snips and the splint came out in a few pieces. No pain whatsoever... I was waiting for the "smell" but there really wasn't anything...? My teeth felt a little "fuzzy" but there was no food or anything stuck to them. He did say that my mouth was really clean...

Right now I'm back to wearing my bands 24/7. I had some spaces in the back of my mouth on Monday and they are already closing up by today. My bite looks so incredible. I have to post some pictures. It's just so weird having my teeth "fit" so well into each other. I always had my top teeth sitting on my bottom teeth. They never went together.

Maybe now I can finally bite into a piece of bread and not use my tongue to tear it off! :-)

Day 40- Stretch, Stretch, Stretch!!!

I'm sorry I haven't posted in a while. I guess I've been getting caught up in post-op life... I know I say this a lot, but time is really flying by. I can't believe I was under the knife 40! days ago already. I remember sitting in the waiting room like it was yesterday. I'm pretty much back to normal as far as talking goes. I still have a little lisp, but that will go away after the splint comes out. Oh yeah! I almost forgot; I'm getting my splint out this week! I was supposed to get it out last week, but I purposely called in and missed my appointment so that I could get an extra week of healing in. I know my OS knows what he's doing, but I really just wanted to make sure that everything was healed enough to prevent any sort of relapse.

I've been stretching about 10 times a day, for about 10 minutes every time. I have noticed a little improvement, but only in mm. I need to get at least another 1/2" and it's going to really hurt. I know every day now it will get harder and harder to stretch, but I just don't have the nerve to force it open... I'm trying the slow and steady method. If there is improvement, I think that's all that matters, not how fast I can do it.

One thing that has been bothering me is my "mushy" pallate. Every time I make a suction (straw) or pretty much whenever I'm eating, I can feel my pallate flex and bend. It's not a fun feeling at all! It kind of reminds me of a baby's head after they're born (soft spot). I'm sure that the bone hasn't filled in the space left by the expansion and the bone that IS there isn't very strong yet. I'm sure with time it will get harder and more rigid. I really hope that my teeth don't start moving around after my splint comes off!

Day 31- PAIN!!!!

Today, I had the worst appointment ever. Last week I was told to stretch my jaw and move it side to side. I thought I was doing a good job. I didn't know, however, that he wanted me to really STRETCH the muscles. I saw him today and I thought things would go smoothly. He told me to open and I did willingly. If I would have known what was coming I would have kept my mouth shut. Without warning, Dr. K started torquing on my jaw, saying, "It's necessary!" Out of pure reflex, I grabbed his arm and squeezed his wrist with super-human strength. It felt like my jaw muscles were tearing and it felt as if my bottom jaw would just snap right off my face. I mean, I had more pain today than I had during this whole experience and I've been through a lot. After my startled surgeon let go of me, he said that I needed to stretch more and more everyday, otherwise my muscles could "scar" and my mouth might never open as far as it should. I wish he would have told me about that last week!! I would have concentrated a lot harder if I would have known that... I felt pretty bad for what I did to him after he told me that, but I wish he would have told me that he was going to pry my tender mouth wide open. It totally caught me off guard. I told him I was sorry and he said that this stuff happens all the time and left the room while rubbing his squashed wrist.

For the rest of the day, I've had a queasy stomach and I felt like throwing up a few times. I told Dr. K that I would work on stretching my jaw myself, but now every time I touch it I feel sick. I still have a week to prove that I can accomplish my goal, but I'm really going to have to work hard at this. I haven't heard of anyone else going through this- Am I the only one facing this challenge?!

Day 28- Jobs..

I was surprised to see that it's been 4 weeks already. Time is really flying for me right now. I'm starting to really get moving on my job situation. I have 3 places now that are accepting me, I just have to weigh the good with the bad in order to choose the right one. I am really hoping to get a position that is close to home. I have an interview/weld test on Thursday, so I'll see how that goes and work from there.

I'm having a hard time stretching my jaw. It feels so tight that it's almost impossible to open any farther than what I'm accomplishing already. If I really force it, I get a jolt of pain by my ear and it really hurts. I guess I can only hope that everyday it gets a tiny bit better. Also, I like Mr. splint for what he has done for me, but he makes talking really difficult! I feel like I can talk just fine in my head, but when I actually try to talk, it comes out all slurred and lisp-y. Also, I've noticed that I've been burning my palate with hot foods because I have no feeling there. This happens especially with oatmeal, because no matter how much I stir it, there's always a really hot spot that manages to make it's way into my mouth. My palate will get puffy for a day and then go away... At least I can't feel it!

Day 26- Life Moves On...

I've been so busy this week that I haven't had much time to go on the internet. I'm starting to apply for jobs now and I'm also going to school 5 days a week. I'm beginning to fall back into my old lifestyle. No more fun and games!

My jaw is getting better, but so slowly! I can open my mouth a little more and I'm moving it side to side. I'm still eating pureed foods because with my numb gums, I really can't chew (it feels so weird!) I can't wait to start doing some serious exercising because I want to put the protein powder I'm eating to good use! I think right now the powder is just maintaining my muscle mass... I gained a few pounds this week; I'm up to 187 pounds. I'm still getting aching pains in my jaw muscles, but with my regular dose of Tylenol/ibuprofen it keeps the pain at bay. The one thing that annoys me is the swelling in my face. I still feel really puffy and it's almost 4 weeks post-op!

I went to my OS on Friday and he said my bite looks amazing. The 4 rubber bands at the front of my mouth did their job and all gaps are closed. He left two bands towards the front and put 2 in back, I guess to just keep everything in place? I asked him about the splint and he said either next week or the week after that. I told him that I wasn't in a hurry to get it off and he agreed that it was a good idea to leave it on as long as possible. I'm thinking 6-7 weeks just to make sure :-)

On a side note- It's so weird finding all the little things that have changed on my "new" jaw. For one, I can't stick my tongue through the gap that I once had. I also can't breath out of my mouth anymore unless I open it! The teeth are so perfectly tight that it really restricts the airflow :-) Finally, I'm noticed the roof of my mouth has dropped dramatically. I used to have a pretty deep palate and now my tongue feels claustrophobic it's so low! I love the fact that I breath entirely out of my nose now, because before I was more of a mouth breather. Maybe my deep palate had something to do with that?

3 Weeks- Aches and Pains

I have to say I'm glad to have made it to week 3 already and I'm glad everything is coming together. It's just that lately I've been having a lot of aches and pains around my muscles in my jaw. I know it's because I'm over-using it. I'm trying to step up to soft foods, like hot cereals and soft pastas, but every time I take my bands off to eat, I end up opening my mouth up just a little too far and then the pain sets in. It really is a hard pain to describe, because it's not anywhere on my jaw. It kind of feels like it's right behind my ears... The good news is, I'm not losing any more weight and that's good (never thought I'd say that!)

School was a joke once again, because my teacher said," No labs today because it's your first day (in that course) so you can go home early". So once again I drove 30 miles for 30 minutes of class. I'm hoping this is the last day this is going to happen! Maybe this is all happening so I have more of a chance to heal? LOL

Day 20- Labor Day

Today was the first day I slept in my own bed since my surgery. Until last night, I was sleeping in my chair and waking up every 30 minutes or so because I wasn't all that comfortable. I thought I might still have trouble sleeping completely horizontal, because it seems like the blood rushes to my head a lot more ever since my surgery. Well, I propped my head up on 2 pillows and slept soundly for 10 hours. I think I'm past that stage now...

My mom decided to have a party at the house today, so we had 12 people over and had a great time visiting. The food was very tempting and I just went into my room until dinner was over with. I could of made a fool out of myself trying to slurp down some ground up food at the table, but I prefer to do that in the privacy of my own room. No matter how hard I try, I always manage to drop some food on my shirt or pants.

My face feels a little better today. My throat isn't bothering me as much and my front teeth don't feel as if they are being ripped out by the rubber bands. My face did swell up a little this morning because of sleeping in my bed. I think because I'm laying down more, there is more pressure on my face, no matter how soft my pillows are.

Day 19- It's All Starting to Hit Me

I spent the night at my grandparent's house and awoke to the smell of eggs, sausages, coffee and buttered toast. UUGGHHH!! How I wish I could of eaten that delicious food! Instead I beer-battered my bass, fried it up and put it in the blender. I have to say, I love fish but drinking your catch really isn't all that appealing...:-) I spent the rest of the morning sleeping since I was still tired from the night before.

At around 2:30, my other aunt and uncle came over with their speedboat. This whole weekend I was planning on doing some water skiing just because I thought I was good enough to not fall down on my face. After thinking about it though, I decided to back out because I really didn't want to wreck my face. Even if I'm pretty good at skiing, there is always a chance that I could hit a big wave and throw my jaw out of alignment or something. Instead I just took a long boat ride and watched my brothers have all the fun. Although I didn't get to go in the water, I know there's always next year and I still had a good time just getting out there.

Now that I'm home, I got to thinking about this journey that I've been through. I still can't believe that I got this done. I feel so lucky because I doubted so much that anything could be done just a few years ago. It seems like such a while since I sat down and talked about surgery and braces. Now I'm already 3 weeks post-op and for some reason, I can't really remember all the hardships I've faced during these last 2 years. I think you forget all of the adjustments and pain when you start to see the "real" you!!

Day 18- Wasting Away

The weekend is finally here. Today I woke up early because of an aching pain somewhere in my head. I can't say it was in my upper/lower jaw, but more like in the back of my throat. I took some Tylenol but couldn't fall asleep. This was the start of a long, tiring weekend. All day I felt exhausted, hungry and this was accompanied by the aching pain in my throat. I think the pain is from me trying to open my mouth to eat, but what can I do? I keep losing weight and I can't survive on shakes anymore. I'm trying to eat oatmeal, but that involves opening my mouth just wide enough to make it hurt. I guess I'm going to have to endure the pain if I want to keep my weight up.

I went to my grandparents today to visit and do a little fishing. I took the boat out which was the first time post-op. I caught a nice, fat 16" bass. It felt good to do some of the things that I love to do again... I'm not one to watch tv all day, so these last 3 weeks or so have been really boring and testing to my spirit.

Day 17- GOLF

So I got up today at 6:00am, got ready and rushed to school. My first class started at 7:30am and I was tired! I managed to make it in on time and was jolted from my sleep into learning. To my amazement, my teacher cut class short by 2.5 hours!! We were told that it was Labor day weekend and we should enjoy our time off. I was actually pretty pi$$ed off, because I just got up extremely early (for me) and drove 15 miles expecting to go to class. To be let go after only 30 minutes made me kind of mad to say the least. Any other day and I might of been happy, but not when it's that early...

I went to my aunt and uncle's house later in the day to visit. I actually started playing golf again which was great. I thought that I wouldn't have the range of motion to play, but it turned out that it wasn't a problem. I got a few pointers from my uncle, who is an aficionado of golf to say the least. He was the one who turned me on to golf only a few months ago and I kind of fell in love with the sport. Let me tell you, it's a lot harder than it looks!

Day 16- Talking...

Another short day at school made today go by very fast. I've been talking a lot more now, even though I still can't really say "s" or a few letter combos. People keep saying that I'm talking great, but between my plugged up ears and my numb face, I really can't say that I believe them. I can talk a little better when I take off my bands, but I don't want to jeopardize my healing process.

My front teeth are really starting to hurt now. It feels as if they are being pulling out because of the 4 rubber bands all located up front. My jaw is still moving and my only gap is just about closed. It's amazing how something like that can get fixed in just a matter of days! I think most of the moving occurs at night, because I move my jaw around so much during the day talking.

I had some sirloin tip roast blended up today. It tasted great, but now I have a stomach ache. Maybe it was too rich for my "virgin" stomach? :-) I guess I'll just spend the rest of the night curled up in a ball on my chair...

Day 15- SCHOOL!

Today was my first day back to school. I e-mailed my teachers 2 days ago to tell them my current situation and I brought in a copy of the email just in case they didn't get it for some reason. My teacher was very understanding and the day went by really fast (all 3 hours of it!) It's just a pain because I have to get a note for every teacher, so I have to do this 4 more times before everyone understands what I'm going through...

My face is feeling so much better. I'm getting a lot of movement back in my "cheek" area so moving my mouth and talking are becoming easier. I also have feeling back in my nose and around my eyes. The same goes for the tip of my chin. I guess it really is a shrinking circle of improvement. My bottom lip is still annoying me just because I can't feel where the glass is when I'm drinking. I'm sick of thinking that I have the glass in my mouth and then I get a bath of juice/shake all over my lap.

I'm sorry about not posting pics- I've been religious about taking them, it's just that they're in my camera right now and I keep forgetting to upload them. I'll do it tomorrow...

Day 14- Another Appointment

It's been 2 weeks since my surgery and I'm healing as expected. Today I drove 30 miles to see my OS and he removed most of my stitches and put some new bands on. I now have 4 extra strong bands right in the front of my mouth. At least before 2 of them were hidden! Now even at the slightest crack of my mouth you see a large mass of bands... Hopefully they will come off next week. On a better note, my OS also said that I could start eating soft foods, like hot cereal and scrambled eggs. I don't think I'm ready for it yet just because I'm afraid of using my new jaw! When he took the bands off to change them, he told me to open as wide as I could. My jaw kind of plopped down because I have no strength in it anymore. It feels really stiff when I open about an inch or so. I guess with everything, it'll just take time before I can open all the way again.

I'm eating like crazy right now and for some reason I'm not gaining any weight. I've been throwing back blended healthy choice soup, squash, applesauce, ice cream, blended turkey, and my usual shakes. My syringe is getting so much use that it's starting to fall apart (really!) I think tomorrow I'm going to try something new that involves a little more than just drinking it down. Maybe some cream of wheat or oatmeal if I'm careful.

My teeth feel as if they all have cavities. They really ache and sting all at the same time. It kind of feels like post ortho adjustment/paper cut between the teeth. If I breath through my mouth for any reason, they REALLY start to hurt. I know I don't have cavities so I can only imagine that the nerves are growing back. My teeth have been very clean lately because I've been brushing 3-4 times a day and I've been taking the rubber bands off to do so. This is like a 15 minute process every time I do it, but I think it's well worth it if I can have squeaky clean teeth.

Day 13- Getting Anxious

I'm getting nervous about school. It's coming up in just 2 days and I still feel like I just had surgery. I have e-mailed all my teachers telling them of my situation and asking for their sympathy. I think I will be OK, it's just that I haven't been out of the house much and have been kind of hiding from the real world. My family says I look fine, but it's hard to just act normal when you have metal poking you everywhere and half your face is numb.... I'm sure I'll be back to normal once my face starts cooperating.

Swelling is always the same now, and only decreases a bit when I use my ice packs. I have been eating a ton lately which is good. Today I had blended squash with butter and brown sugar, cream corn, mushroom soup, 3 strawberry shakes and the rest of my antibiotics :-) I've also been drinking a lot of natural juices, either fresh from the garden or natural store-brought. I've been "de-banding" daily now to brush the inside of my mouth and to work my jaw a bit. I can feel myself healing because when I walk around, my jaw doesn't "creak" anymore (Before day 10 or so, I could really tell that my bones were held together by nothing more than screws and plates!).

One more day of being a lazy bum and then it's back to life-

Day 12

Nothing new to report today- I pretty much just sat at home and did a few things. My face is constantly tingling which is really starting to bother me. I know it's just part of the healing process, but it can get annoying pretty fast. I think my swelling has gone down a little more just because I've been using my icepack more and more. Other than that, just another day behind me...

Day 11- Out and About

Today I finally went for a drive. I took my kid brother to my grandparents house and spent some time over there for a few hours. Then I made the 25 mile trek home without any problems. I know they say to be careful when your on meds but I guess that only applies to lightweights. It really doesn't affect me at all.

For dinner tonight I had some fresh blueberry juice, sweet potatoes (through a syringe!) and a strawberry shake. I also had some canned soup beforehand and the salt in there just burned the inside of my mouth. It makes me wonder what I put into my body when I'm healthy and oblivious to those things.

I think there is some feeling coming back into my face, even if it is taking forever. I can now drink out of a cup and I can swish water/mouthwash around in my mouth. Before today, my mouth felt "dead". I've also been taking my front 2 rubber bands off to brush my teeth on the inside of my mouth and my tongue. That felt great when I finally did that the other day! I put the bands right back on, so I doubt anything negative should come of it...

Day 10- Sleepy

Today started as a normal day but as it wore on, it just got to be really "blah" feeling. It's really hot and humid around here so going outside is kind of out of the question for me. I spent most of the day inside trying to eat as much as I could. I spent the rest of the afternoon sleeping....

I think one cool thing that happened today was that I ate a whole can of cream styled corn. I usually am not crazy about the stuff, but I figure anything but another strawberry shake! I blended up the corn and nuked it, put it in my giant syringe and pryed my mouth open. The tip on the syringe is pretty big, so it was a squeeze (I'm still wearing 4 rubber bands) That felt so good going down and for some reason I got a little lightheaded.. Things started spinning for a while which was kinda weird- It wasn't THAT good, so what's the deal? I guess my body is really starting to crave food!

Swelling is the same. Numbness is the same. At least I have a full stomach!

Day 9- A Queasy Feeling

Today was going great and I was looking forward to seeing my cousins who were coming over to visit. At about 3:00pm. however, I came down with a severe case of stomach pain. I was literally hunched over when my visitors came. The humidity around here is at 100% with all the rain/flooding we've had going on around here and when I went outside I almost threw up! I quick ran inside and went into the bathroom. It was weird, because after a while and a dose of pepto, I felt ok for the rest of the night.

My Aunt gave me a whole quart of Trader Joe's natural homemade tomato basil soup. I first thought I wouldn't be able to eat any, because it was pretty thick. Well, as of right now, that whole quart of soup is almost gone and in my stomach. Wow was that good! That was my first big "meal" post-op and it felt good to get some warm liquids in me. It came at a good time because I was really getting sick of my ice-cold shakes...

My swelling seems like it has plateaued and everything still feels pretty puffy and numb. I guess you can say that it does get a little better each day, but I'm starting to notice ALOT less progress. I guess now comes the long haul, day 1 of 6 months until everything returns to normal.

Day 8

I had the most incredible night of sleep last night- it was just amazing! :-) I woke up at 10:30AM which put me at a new post-op record of 10 hours of sleep. I actually had trouble getting up to take my meds, because I was so relaxed. I don't even think I took my pain killers before bed, maybe they are the culprits keeping me awake at night? I know whenever I take them, I have a very slight feeling like my head is spinning or my brain is working overtime and not really thinking about anything. It's a weird feeling...

I'm been spitting out stitches and chunks of skin as my palate continues to heal. It feels so gross, especially since I can't see in there. I'm just glad I'm healing and I'll leave it at that.